Secondhand Sex



In a world where apparently just about anything can be published, two friends embark on a journey to read the worst romance novels they can find while maybe maintaining their sanity.


  • The Viscount's Runaway Bride


    In this episode we cover “The Vicount’s Runaway Bride” an old timey period piece. Fun Fact: This piece contains periods, us debating how nerdy we are, and countless talk of musicals.

  • Jane's Warlord


    This time we talk about “Jane’s Warlord” and end up relating everything to Dr. Who. Scenes are read in the style of Fred Schneider of B-52’s fame, Jodie Foster from “Silence of the Lambs”, Ricky Gervais, Klaus the German, an Alien, and a 14 Year Old Moron. We also play “Casting Couch” because we really want to see this become a movie. Make it happen Hollywood.

  • Divergent (Part 2)


    Join us as we finish up Divergent with Tris and Tobes! We play Quizticles and Happy Endings. We discuss the Fantastic Four movie, which one? It doesn’t matter, because they all suck. We also read scenes with the voices of an Adolescent Lisping Psychopath, Batman, a Russian Villain, Jimmy Stewart, Janice from Friends, and maybe JFK. Remember ask not what your faction can do for you, ask what you can do for your faction. Also, Tobes…dude…she’s a minor… #WeAreAllDivergent Remember to share, subscribe, rate, and like us on Facebook for more updates!

  • Divergent (Part 1)


    In this episode, we cover "Divergent" with Fake Katniss, Madame Pomfrey, Winston Churchill, Cartman's Mom, a Lisping Psychopath. We swear this makes sense...

  • The Vampire Diaries (Part 2)


    In this episode we finish up "The Vampire Diaries" and learn what a dumb supper and widow's walk is, and learn that Katlyn can't read. We also play "Quizticles" and "Oscar Climax" featuring Mr. Lord of the Fling, Gollum. Be sure to subscribe, rate, and share!

  • The Vampire Diaries (Part 1)


    We are reading “Vampire Diaries”! In this episode we talk about crows and their curves, blood oaths, and who we would love to just shove a stake in the face.

  • The Cunning Linguist


    This is seriously the most disgusting book we have ever read. We read scenes from the book as Roz from Monsters, Inc., Christopher Walken, and in the style of a David Attenboroughdocumentary. We also play “Gag Reflex” and “How Many Licks”.

  • Second Chance Stepbrother


    In this episode we cover the "book", "Second Chance Stepbrother" and yes it is exactly what you think it would be. We play "Premature Predictions", "Casting Couch", and delight you with many an accent. Werewolves also come up. We swear it makes sense with context! Please share, like, and rate our podcast!

  • A Christmas for Carol


    We read “A Christmas for Carol” in this very special Holiday Special! Listen as we regale you with a poorly written tale about lesbians that is guaranteed to make you want to go and watch “The Muppet Christmas Carol”. 

  • Calendar Girl


    In this episode we cover "Calendar Girl" the first in a series you can finish reading, but we never will. We play "Premature Predictions", "Next", and reenact parts of the book as Cartman and our French accents! 

  • Lusted


    In this episode we cover "Lusted" which is basically "50 Shades of Grey" fanfic. It makes us sad. However, you get to hear our Owen Wilson and Maggie Smith impressions! We also give these characters the ending they deserve in the game "Happy Endings"!

  • The Wedding Trap


    We unabashedly kind of like this book. Listen as we delve into the world of "The Wedding Trap" and practice our Transatlantic accent. Added bonus, drink every time we say, "There's a war on, see?"**Please don't actually do this, you will die of alcohol poisoning...

  • Pierce Me


    In this episode we cover the gem of a novel "Pierce Me". We read a dramatic radio play as Voldemort and talk a bit about genital piercings. End of list.

  • Revenge of the Awful Book (50 Shades of Grey - Part Three)


    Join us as we discuss the final part of "50 Shades of Grey" and blow your mind with hilarious "Happily Ever Afters" for Christian and Anastasia. 

  • The Drone Wars (50 Shades of Grey - Part Two)


    Join us again as we cover the titillating second part of "50 Shades of Grey". Yes the word titillate was used on purpose, and it makes me laugh. You giggled too. Be real with yourself...

  • The Phallic Menace (50 Shades of Grey - Part One)


    Katlyn and Laura talk emails, sex bears, and Christian Grey’s Tinder bio, in their debut episode, as they start their 3-part discussion on the infamous “50 Shades of Grey"